Is it rude to invite yourself to someone's plans?
Guilty
The short answer
Asking whether you can join is fine, but announcing that you are coming is not. Small plans, like a dinner for two, are almost never open.
The ruling
From the public record. Names are replaced with roles.
Small claims division
Case no.PC-2026-06059
The friend who booked dinner for two v. The friend who replied I'm in
Filed 10/19/2026
- Plaintiff
- The friend who booked dinner for two
- Defendant
- The friend who replied I'm in
Statement of claim
I posted a photo of a dinner reservation for me and my best friend for her birthday. A friend replied I'm in, what time. He came. The table was for two. We sat at the bar.
Charge
Self-invitation to a two-person birthday dinner by reply to a photo
Judgment
Guilty
Friend found guilty of turning a birthday dinner for two into a bar seating
Sentence
The defendant pays for the next dinner for two, which he will not attend, and asks before joining any plan for the next three months.
How the court usually rules on this
The court distinguishes asking to join from declaring attendance. A question leaves the host room to say no, and the court expects hosts to answer it honestly. Smaller plans carry a stronger presumption that the guest list is final. A friend who has invited himself more than once is usually found guilty.
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